This is a phrase that I’ve used for many years, but admittedly, I frequently become preoccupied with a laundry list of tasks that threaten all my “intentional parenting” tools, forcing me into old habits that I preach against. 

As I reflect over this past week, I’ve been confronted with an ugly truth. More times than not, I was distracted from my littles, which led to many frustrations with their mistakes, an overload of questions, and countless messes. Finding myself a little teary-eyed, I discovered that my family didn’t always move to the beat of my drum. I’d also been distracted by other idols of mine, so when things began to occur outside my control, I couldn’t help but become annoyed. Thank God for conviction, conviction led to repentance, and repentance led to me apologizing to my people for putting unfair expectations on them – expectations that I can’t always meet myself. 

I’m sure I’m not alone in falling guilty of this and I want us all to place our failures before the throne, find ways to implement new tactics, and know that giving ourselves and others grace will assist in bearing fruit.

Here are a few tools on how to limit distractions and frustrations:

Set Boundaries on Your Screen Time 

Cell phones and social media can be so distracting at times, and we may become frustrated or annoyed by comparing ourselves to what we’re being exposed to through our devices. In order to limit my screen time, I place timers on my cell phone, turn off many notifications, and set ringtones for my husband and a few others that I’m okay responding to throughout the day. Then I can carve out specific time to tackle emails and text messages from others. These boundaries help me keep my thoughts organized and my focus sharp.

Don’t Let the Mess Control You

 I’ve told y’all before that I’m OCD (not using the term lightly), so cleaning is an idol for me. Although I view it as a good one to have, I’m often distracted by it. This distraction causes me to miss memorable times with my family, become overwhelmed when messes occur and turn into a drill sergeant to my entire village. I’m learning to remind myself that accidents happen, kids can sometimes be messy, and living in spaces can’t always mimic an RH showcase room. 

If you’re anything like me, I encourage you to create a weekly, monthly, and daily cleaning routine. In doing this, you will also find a few things that can be left undone. Whether it’s closing a door, having a junk drawer or closet, placing things in a basket, or hiring a housekeeping service, there are ways to manage your surroundings without having to tackle everything on your list.

Remember Your Purpose

I love to serve, so I’m extra when it comes to my meals and cookware. I love to serve my family food in cute dishes, create adorable themes… the list goes on. Although I can become distracted by creating these elaborate experiences for them, they’d rather have me focused, patient, and full of joy rather than serving heart-shaped waffles without a smile. Let’s not become too distracted creating beautiful moments we can’t enjoy because we’re frustrated with the very people we’re making them for.

These tips can help you reduce future frustrations, but sometimes life can just get in the way. When you’re overwhelmed, schedule non-negotiable time away, take a 5-minute potty break, or be vulnerable with family or friends and tell them you could use some help. Above all else, remember to submit our distractions and frustrations before the throne.