There was once a time when I felt equipped to teach other people’s children but not equipped to teach my own. I guess there’s the pressure of being responsible for everything versus one subject. Also, there’s the “balancing mom and teacher” thing. I must say, God has been faithful. Almost every time I become so discouraged or overwhelmed with homeschooling, He provides grace, rest, conformation and reassurance that this is what He wants me to do during this season of life. I am fulfilling the vision in His will, not my will! And I’m grateful, to say the least. My heart is full even at the end of the most stressful days.
To get into more details, here are 5 specific reasons my husband and I felt lead to homeschool:
The Opportunity to Teach
We get the opportunity to shape and mold our kids full time at such an early, vulnerable age. While doing so, we have to opportunity to control their influence and focus on building their character, faith, and other skills morals & values that we have as a family. Character and Faith are extremely important to us. While you don’t have to homeschool to have these traits, for us I love that I GET to nurture and build my children up in these areas frequently.
Meeting Individual Needs
We get to cater to each kids’ learning style. Although my kids are all still very young, it’s extremely evident that each one of my kids have different learning styles and I get the opportunity to observe that regularly and make adjustments based on trial and error. Most schools have a one shoe fits all policy when it comes to learning and testing. In my opinion, that’s unfair and NOT true. During my brief experience in public schools, it was obvious to me why children were not making good grades or passing the state tests.
No Need to Rush
We get to go at our own pace. Sometimes it takes kids longer than a week to grasp/master new material. I honestly didn’t retain much of what I learned in school because I simply memorized the information for a test, then never saw it again. I desire for my children to learn the material not briefly memorize it. Therefore, if it takes us 2 weeks to learn to add vs subtraction, nouns vs pronouns, we get to take the time and focus on just that.
Flexibility
We’ve literally moved 10 times in 7 years. Therefore, my kids’ school would have changed just as much. Also, since our schedule is different than most–Homeschool provides us flexibility in school time, curriculums, locations, etc. We typically do school year-round to make up for the slow or missed weeks—and when we travel we can take our work with us or plan hands-on learning experiences for the kids in whatever city we’re visiting.
Quality Time
We get to spend a ton of time together as a family. It is my desire for us to be a close-knit family. Because we spend most of our time together, we get to love on each other constantly. Work out our issues in the moment, and do team-building exercises that will enhance our oneness.
If you’re considering homeschooling your children, I encourage you to do the following:
Seek God first. Pray with fellow believers.
Don’t be discouraged by what your friends and family members may think. They probably don’t have their life all together anyhow.
Establish your why! Have no fear of being exposed to the world.
Start. Just start. Give it a try and understand that public or private schools are still always an option in the future.
Know that there are extremely rough days and extremely amazing days — they can both be rewarding!
Know that you are not alone. There are endless amounts of curriculums, communities, and resources available to assist on the journey!
Stay connected with us at the F Word! I’ll be providing lots of resources along the way.
I absolutely love Christmas. Yearly I find excitement in the traditions, decorations, shopping,& movies. Since I was able to get ahead on planning this year, I’ve been spending every moment of my free time indulging in Hallmark Christmas movies.
Yesterday as I sat and anticipated the ending of my 5th movie it dawned on me that most of the movies had a similar storyline. Finding true love that you can’t live without during the holiday season. It became evident that more Christmas movies displayed finding true love in man and not the true love of Christ.
Glancing around my home I was reminded that Christmas is more than decorating, food, shopping, finding true love . Although I’m grateful for them all my heart was filled in remembering that Christmas is about the birth of our savior, reckless love of God, and the gift of eternal life. We should find pure joy in that this holiday season!
As we enjoy our holiday season let’s remind people of the greatest love story that’s ever been written, the Bible, the greatest gift that’s ever been given, Jesus! And the one relationship we can’t live without, Christ!
We love because he first loved us.– 1 John 1:19
For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. – John 3:16
But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. – Romans 5:8
If I’m completely honest, being a wife and mom is HARD, and homeschooling… well, that’s even harder!
I’ve actually questioned myself every single day…
… Am I a good mom?
… What am I doing?
… Am I enough?
… Am I doing them a disservice?
… Do I yell or use my spoon too often?
… Will I regret it all later? … Is God pleased?
The sign reads “First Day”… but it’s actually our 5th week. The date is printed wrong, and we’ve had a rocky start. My initial vision for this was everyone being dressed similar, nicer hair cut/styles, and a different background.
Why?
Because I wanted them to be “picture perfect“ for my 6-year-old scrapbook collection that’s still inside a box. If they didn’t take the photos today, I risked my superhero shattering the frames or never getting around to them being picture perfect.
Today, however, God knew I actually needed encouragement…
I absolutely love how God works. The children’s tutor took the photos for me while I was at a Bible Study. I didn’t instruct her on where to take them; however, I love that she chose a spot next to the scriptures I placed on my front porch to encourage our visitors. Since I’m usually in a hurry, I often overlook them, but today, God knew I actually needed the encouragement myself…
I am with you ALWAYS (Matthew 28:20).
As I sip on my 8th espresso shot of the day, I rest on this scripture.
I am reminded that regardless of if I’m having an awesome day or a crappy day — feeling confident or defeated, the kids are behaving like nutcases — The Lord is with me, and His GRACE is sufficient for me.
Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me ( 2 Corinthians 12:9).
Until recently, I had never realized that good things, even Godly things, can become an idol. I realized this on a recent “rabbit trail” that God took me on through His Word. Have you ever had one of those times where you wanted to be in the Word, but you didn’t know where to begin? Perhaps, like me, you just started flipping through the pages asking God to speak to you. (I know this is not the best way to study God’s Word, but alas.) As I was doing this one day, I kept landing on verses about marriage and family. I wasn’t super clear on what God was trying to tell me, if anything, so I kept praying that He would speak to me and lead me in His Word.
A few days later, I had to miss church because I was sick. I decided I would listen to a Francis Chan sermon, so I went to good ole Google to search for one. Ironically, as I tried to search for a Francis Chan sermon, I kept finding articles and sermons about idolatry. I also started praying, flipping through the Word, and asking God to speak to me. Every page I landed on, the word “idol” would jump off the page at me.
“Ok God,” I thought, “maybe you want to talk to me about marriage, family, and idolatry?”
Eventually, I landed on a sermon by Tim Keller on idolatry and his book Counterfeit Gods (while searching for a Francis Chan sermon, go figure). I read part of Counterfeit Gods awhile back, so I grabbed that book and my Bible, opened up my journal and said, “God, here I am. Teach me.” He revealed some powerful and convictional things to me over the next couple of weeks about idolatry and my own heart.
I realized that when good things become “ultimate” things, they become bad things. But good, God-given blessings are often hard to identify as idols because they can be so subtle. Our hearts were made to run on God. He is the treasure of great worth and the greatest blessing of all. When his blessings become ultimate, they ruin us and rob Him of his glory. Our hearts were made to worship Him and be satisfied by Him supremely.
God also revealed to me a few litmus tests that exposed marriage and motherhood as an idol for me:
Identity
My identity was too wrapped up in my role as wife and mother. I was finding too much of my value and worth in these roles. When these areas of life were going well, all was well with my soul. But when these areas were difficult or not going the way I wanted, I was dejected, worried, depressed, or feeling worthless. When something or someone has that much power over your soul, you know it is an idol.
Focus
Too much of my mind and heart were focused on marriage and motherhood. These roles consumed the vast majority of my mind and heart space and had become my supreme treasure. I even went to the Word in order to find out how to be a better mother and wife, rather than primarily to commune with God and be a better daughter of His. Again, so subtle! Because seeking out to be a better wife and mother is a good, Godly, important thing. But it should never trump our primary role as worshiper and daughter of God.
Time
Being “selfish” with my time to commit every moment to family. I realized I was not even open to hearing God lead me in any other direction. I know there are seasons of life when there is not much time for anything but family, and I believe God has designed these roles to be our primary focus as women, especially over ourselves, our careers, or even ministry, but not over our focus on Him. However, I realized I was not even open to God’s leading into other aspects of service, whether that might be with our neighbors, at our church, or making disciples outside of my home.
Pride & Self-Centeredness
I found pride and self-centeredness surrounding my role as mother and wife. The roles of mother and wife are sanctifying, self-sacrificing ones, to say the least. If we allow it, God will use these roles as a vehicle to sanctify us and transform us into His image probably more than any other. Yet, self can still stay on the throne of our hearts even as we go about our self-sacrificing external actions. If we love and thrive on the position, authority, spotlight, attention, and praise surrounding whatever role we find ourselves in, it is probably an idol. If motherhood is an idol, praise and affirmation about our children or about our mothering will cause pride and exuberance to bubble up and effect the rest of our day. On the contrary, if we receive criticism about our children or mothering, we might feel ashamed, frustrated, even angry. Image and caring what others think about us and our family will matter a lot more as well.
Attitudes
Furthermore, our attitudes amidst our role as mother and wife will often reveal who (and what) is on the throne of our hearts. If we complain often and view our kids as a burden most of the time (the “martyr mom”), yet care about being seen as a humble, self-sacrificing mom who prizes her family and is an amazing mom and wife, self and family are probably on the throne. If we are growing more and more in cheerful, self-forgetful service to God and our family, filled with the fruits of the Spirit, while caring less and less about our image or what others think about our family, this reflects a humble, selfless heart where God is on the throne. Motherhood and marriage should be vehicles to bring glory to God, disciple, train, and raise up our kids in the nurture and admonition of the Lord, and serve, complement, and help our husbands. So often, we view our kids or spouse as trophies that will make us happy or look good.
So what is the solution to our pervasive problem of idolatry? I love what Tim Keller says about the only cure to idolatry in his book Counterfeit Gods: “What you need is an over-mastering, positive passion.” He goes on to say, “Jesus must become more beautiful to your imagination, more attractive to your heart, than your idol. That is what will replace your counterfeit gods. If you uproot the idol and fail to “plant” the love of Christ in its place, the idol will grow back,” (pg 172).
I pray that I will come to see and know Christ as what He is: the most beautiful, amazing, incredible blessing and treasure I can possibly behold and attain. He alone is worthy of praise, and He alone will satisfy. I praise God that He has allowed me to be a wife and a mother, but I pray those roles will take their rightful place and so bring more glory to Him and more joy to my life. Blessings!
The question I’ve been asked the most in the past 6 years has not been about my faith or redemption, my love for my family, nor my personal goals. It’s been, “How does it feel to be married to an NFL player?”
Usually, before I can answer the question (because I always pause) the answer is suggested for me. “I’m sure it’s…”
Then, I smile and give the answer that’s expected. “It’s awesome, such a neat experience.” I turn the conversation by adding, “But, it’s bigger than football for us. It’s our ministry.” That’s the part some are not interested in hearing about.
In the earlier years of my marriage, I would become startled, angry and offended by this question. One day, I even contemplated asking a lady, “Well, how does it feel being married to an adulterous engineer?” Now, I know that sounds extremely harsh, and it’s certainly not Christ-like, but I often wish people understood that my love for my husband is not conditioned by his occupation.
Many wouldn’t believe (or maybe you would) the questions I’ve been asked, the comments that’s been made towards my children and me, or how I’ve been treated because my husband goes to a job everyday that he loves.
I get it. There are some ladies who are all about “the status,” rolling in the dough, and basking in all the glory days. But guess what? I’M NOT HER! I am not a fan!
Don’t mistake me; I’m grateful for my husband’s success, the way he provides for our family, and the platform he’s been granted. But, when I see him walk through the door after a long days work I don’t see an NFL player. I see a man who loves and serves God with his entire life, a man who loves me as Christ loves the church, and a man who would lay down his life and walk away from IT ALL for the love of Christ, his wife, and his children.
So, how does it feel to be married to a Christian man who happens to play football? It’s amazing beyond words!
How does it feel being married to an NFL player? It’s challenging! Why? Because…
It’s learning the power of healthy boundaries and saying no. That not every outstanding ministry opportunity is for me to commit to.
It’s accepting that I don’t need a huge, immaculate home to create the life I desire for my family and to be a servant, mentor, or entertainer.
It’s understanding that no matter what I do, I can’t and don’t need to please everyone. As long as I’m pleasing Him, everything else will follow.
It’s coming back to the heart of worship where everything I do is all about my Father, for His glory.
It’s taking the standards of the world (family and friends included) off myself and replacing them with the standards of God. Not “gaining the world and losing my soul.” (Matthew 16:26)
It’s living in light of the Gospel daily. Tim Keller says, “The gospel is this: we are more sinful and flawed in ourselves than we ever dared believe, yet at the very same time we are more loved and accepted in Jesus Christ than we ever dared hope.” God’s love is unconditional and I don’t need to become a better version of me to receive all that he has to offer. It’s a free gift from Him.
It’s letting the Holy Spirit guide my life, not my flesh: I love what Romans 8:5-6 says: Those who live according to the flesh have their minds set on what the flesh desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires. The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace. I have found this so true that when my mind is governed by the flesh, life feels unrestful, complicated, and empty.
It’s not trying to be the co-author of my own life, for my story is already written and it’s far greater than anything I could attempt to write on my own.
It’s learning the importance of having a “Mary heart in a Martha’s world.” Sitting at his feet. Resting in Him. Trusting His purpose, plan, and process.
It’s surrendering everything to Him: thoughts, emotions, and actions.
It’s being in the Word daily and seeking to walk in obedience.
I think the simplicity God is calling me to can be summed up in the word abide. As Jesus says, “Abide in me, and I in you” (John 15:4). Keep company with Jesus in simple and pure fellowship, devotion, and intimacy. Stay near to Him in vital connection. This is the greatest privilege we have! Like I said, it’s not easy with the myriad of distractions from without and within, but it is simple and leads to life and fruitfulness!
Enjoy a space to connect, be empowered and educated to seek Jesus wholeheartedly, identify blind spots, seek growth, learn to love, forgive, laugh, cook amazing food, and understand that living the in the spotlight is not always roses & candy.
