Apr 29, 2021 | Family & Home, Parenting
Parent Routine: Getting Kids Down for Bedtime
Get to sleep… now!
Bedtime… it can be a struggle. I don’t understand why kids don’t like bedtime! After a long day of working, mom-ing, and all the things in between, bedtime has become one of the things I don’t play about. 7:30 PM. (I may bend every now and then, but not often at all.) Here are a few tips for getting your kids down to bed as smooth as possible.
- Create a schedule/chart that’s visible for the kids. The chart can use large lettering for your children who can read but use photos for the children who can’t read just yet. This helps them look forward to what’s next.
- Set alarms that you and the kids recognize. I have alarms that go off all throughout the day on my phone with ringtones both the kids and I remember. At 7 PM, my alarm goes off every 5 minutes leading up to 7:30. This helps us transition smoothly from downtime after dinner to brushing teeth to story and prayer, and then to bedtime. [Now, when dad’s away, one of the kids always pops up to “protect me” or as they like to say, “so I’m not lonely”.
It’s so cute!]
- Put the kids to bed awake. My older kids get to read books most nights until they fall asleep. Other nights, they may get to play games on the kindle, but it turns off automatically after a certain time.
- Put the “baby” to bed awake too! I have done it all with my infants: co-sleep, bed in my room, sleep in their room… all of the options. What has been the most fruitful for our family, once the newborn phase is over, is to train them to fall on their own and not to rock them to sleep!
“Wake-up time is not easy either! (Can I get a witness?)”
Wake up! Wake up! Wake up!
Wake-up time is not easy either! (Can I get a witness?) When you start waking kids up, they always want to sleep in later. When I’m almost done with breakfast, I call on the baby monitor for everyone to get up. I give them 5 minutes of whining then I do a last call!
- Checklist time. They begin working on their checklists when they get up. They have a chalk sign of all the things they need to do before they leave their room.
- Help time. I then go in and help them finish getting dressed and check for anything they missed that needs completed before departing the bedroom for breakfast.
Jan 30, 2021 | Faith, Family & Home
Finding Balance Through Self-Care
I will admit, I most certainly have a tendency to… let’s say, overcommit to some of my gospels. First and foremost? Philippians 2:3. You know, the part that says “Count others more significant than yourselves.” I can’t tell you how often I find myself run ragged trying to ensure that all those around me have what they need; nice clothes, exercise, balanced meals, spiritual enrichment, and this list goes on. Meanwhile, I push myself to the side, looking like a stray dog, overweight, body aching, eating cake for breakfast.
Get Honest With Yourself
At some point, I had to recognize that self neglect had become something I was so guilty of, it was damaging my health. Self-care never was a priority for me because I so frequently struggled under the false burden to prove I was an excellent follower of Christ by being servant to my family and community. Don’t get me wrong, this verse should be very instrumental in our day to day lives, but never at the risk of our own mental and physical wellbeing.
Understand All That You Give
I entered 2020 running on empty, exhausted with my life, emotionally defeated, and physically drained. I look back now and know that had God not revealed to me early on the importance of caring for myself, I would have broken. He gave me a simple lesson: you cannot fill another’s cup if yours is empty. We are called to live selflessly, without conceit, to not show partiality, and to display the same unconditional love and servanthood to our neighbors as Christ does for us. Nevertheless, God desires for us to be whole in Him first by obtaining a great level of spiritual health. We must remember that Christ needs us to give to ourselves so that we may then give to others.
“Caring for myself does not make me self-centered, it does not negate all that I do for others.”
Fix Yourself Up
It has certainly been a year of growth, but I am most thankful that finally I have gathered the awareness that my overall health is just as important as the health of those closest to me.
Moreover, caring for myself does not make me self-centered, it does not negate all that I do for others, nor does it take away from living out my calling through Christ.
So how am I going to make changes in my self-care this year?
^
This means a long list of exercising, drinking more water, taking my supplements, limiting my sugar intake, seeing my health care providers and yes that includes my massage therapist.
^
I need to seek assistance to properly confront my anxiety and OCD, and overcome the stigmas I associate with needing help.
^
Embrace the people around me that bring me love and laughter.
It is time I learned that caring for myself equips me to understand what I need in all facets of life and to be able to identify when those needs aren’t being met. And boy, am I going overboard with it this year!
Jan 22, 2021 | Family & Home, For The Holidays, Homeschool
School… this can be a dreaded word even in “normal” times, but these days, it is especially daunting since many of us have found ourselves navigating school at home. Frankly speaking, school has recently become something I dread the most, and this is definitely true after the holiday break.
As a recovering perfectionist, when I don’t master certain goals easily, I avoid pursuing them altogether. So now you’re either thinking “I’m not alone!” or “Why am I taking homeschool advice from this looney?!” Well, perhaps my own trial and error can shed some light on getting back into the swing of homeschooling after the holidays!
Here are a few simple, yet helpful tips:
Find Balance
Like everything in life, passion and drive will go up and down. While some days are wonderful and others aren’t as great, balance means looking at the overall average, taking small steps, and focusing on the big picture. As you seek balance in homeschooling after an amazing socially distanced holiday and welcome into 2021, trust that God has already paved the way.
Bring God into Your Lessons
It doesn’t matter how you do it – whether it’s VeggieTales, Superbook, a simple prayer, or an in-depth study of a book in the Bible – invite God into your homeschool. He is essential. Good luck attempting to handle it all without Him! Bringing God into your lessons will not only set a strong example of faith, perseverance, and patience for your kids, but it will also help you to feel a sense of peace and hope as you face each day and new challenges.
Give Yourself Opportunities to Fail
The thing about failing is that it offers us a chance to learn and do better next time. As long as you’re breathing, there are endless opportunities to dust yourself off and try again. Homeschooling inevitably comes with some struggles along the way, but don’t let fear of failure stop you from feeling confident in your abilities as a teacher and as a mother. I encourage you to know that you are doing just what God has called you to do during this season of life.
Avoid Comparisons
Comparing your kids to others, or even to their siblings, will lead to setbacks and frustrations. Kids excel at different things, and not everyone learns at the same speed. To be honest, I’ve fallen short on this countless times. In these moments, it’s helpful to take a step back and identify your kids’ unique strengths. Help them to grow these skill sets and use them to their advantage to improve in other areas.
As we all embark on the return to homeschooling, it is important that we remember to seek balance, include God in our lessons, find freedom in failure, and embrace our kids’ unique potential!
Nov 21, 2020 | Family & Home, Home Organization
We recently survived our 11th move to be exact, and I just couldn’t endure the thought of unpacking and organizing solo with all I currently have going on—especially with the holidays right around the corner. I often say organizing is one of my superpowers, but at the moment, my battery was low. I had to rest my pride. So, if you’re feeling like I did and you’re wondering how you can ever get your life together before the holidays hit, here are 5 suggestions:
1. Reach Out For Help.
Like I mentioned, I rested…tied down…let go of…my pride! If you can hire someone to help you quickly organize, I’d highly recommend it! Whether it’s your entire house or just one room, it can drastically change your life.
My friends over at A Pinch of Help showed up with superhero capes a few weeks ago and tackled the project better than I ever could’ve imagined. More details to come on my experience with them, but they’d be my top recommendation. You can request this as an early Christmas or Birthday gift, as I did!
2. Purge & Place in the Room(s) Most Used.
Decide which room(s) you will use the most during this holiday season and purge and place everything in a basket or bin to contain it. This will hold it in place and give the allusion of “organized” for my mind’s sake until you have more time. Baskets help everything appear neater than it may essentially be. Don’t leave any loose items or toys around. And most importantly, make sure everyone in the family knows and agrees to place what belongs in each basket DAILY.
3. Wipe & Dust Everything!
A clean smell can do a lot! It gets you off to a good start. Aim to tackle one room per day for only one hour. Incorporate the quick “purce and place” tactic, and then, the days following, take out the Windex, the All Purpose Cleaner, the Bleach, and wipe it all down. Sweep or mop. Dust the rugs and furniture. You will feel better! When things look and smell fresh, it makes a world of difference! And quite honestly, it doesn’t take as much time as we think.
4. Involve the whole family!
Want to get it done quickly? Involve the whole family. Create teams, assign each team a couple of tasks, turn on some music, create a completion list, and turn it into an organizing party for the entire family!
5. Ask a Friend.
Can’t turn to your immediate family for help? Turn to another trusted family member or even ask a friend to help you for a couple of hours. Establish a plan beforehand that you guys get started. You can use this time to bond, have a glass of wine, and get the job done! You can also offer to help them do the same thing!
That’s a wrap! Enjoy an organized holiday season! Always feel free to message me for more tips!
Oct 16, 2020 | Family & Home
In starting this blog, it was important to me to not only give advice and inspiration but to also build connections with my readers. I thought to myself this week: What better way to bond than by sharing some personal facts?
You, of course, have come to know my family and home-life, but I’d love to share five tidbits for you to get to know me a little better as well.
1. I am a loud and proud graduate of an HBCU.
I attended Rust College in Mississippi for my undergrad degree. While small, Rust is one of the oldest Historically Black Colleges in the US. With their heavy focus on the liberal arts and religion, it was the perfect fit for me.
2. I’m Greek!
Skee-Wee!! I am a sister of the Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority, and I am proud to contribute to a legacy of social change and advocacy. We continue to focus on helping alleviate problems concerning girls and women in order to improve their social stature, maintain their progressive interest in college life, and always be of ‘Service to All Mankind’.
3. Graduate school changed my fate.
I was offered a scholarship to attend graduate school at The Ohio State University, but I turned down the opportunity to be a Buckeye. In a whirlwind of devastation and regret, I enrolled at Arkansas State for graduate school, even though I had NEVER been to Arkansas in my life! God was looking out for me, though — it was in graduate school that I met my husband and began building our beautiful life together.
4. I had a whole different future planned out.
Originally, I thought I was going to pursue a career in education. As a English and Liberal Arts fanatic, I had a plan to teach for 5 years before becoming a high school administrator (while maintaining a job as a part-time professor, of course). And to wrap it all up, I would become the youngest superintendent in my district. …My how things have changed!
5. I’ve always been a driven and busy bee with a diverse spread of interests.
You better believe my resume is extensive! I started my side hustle early by braiding hair in middle school. I wanted to become a hairstylist (ha!). In high school, I juggled school full-time while working 35 hours per week (not to mention my two extra jobs every summer). I have become a “jack of all trades” with experience in everything from education and administrative work to fast food and retail. I even worked at a poultry plant (shocking to know that I’m still not a vegetarian after that). I am proud now to hold the acclaimed job title of Domestic Engineer!
Now, your turn! Comment 5 fun facts we haven’t heard!
Sep 29, 2020 | Family & Home, Parenting
In a world where we are all easily enticed to become more like our peers or social media influencers, it becomes a battle to stay true to the person within — to the person that you really are. Desiring change and rapid growth is beautiful; however, it can often cause us to compromise ourselves in the process depending on our purpose and focus.
This is why I admire my children so much.
They have taught me so much over the course of motherhood, but one of the most heartfelt lessons I’ve learned is how to be genuine in the midst of people telling me who I should be.
Witnessing the authenticity they boldly display has encouraged me to unapologetically be true to me!
No Compromising!
While watching my kids interact with each other, I’ve noticed that there are some core parts of their personality they just don’t compromise. Despite what they see or hear, they remain true to who they are. Although I may have only a few more years to witness this (since they’re still so young and have limited influences), I’ve found encouragement in their little big personalities!
There have definitely been moments where I’ve found myself compromising who I am and what I believe to protect others’ feelings. At some point, their voices became louder than mine or God’s. I used to work to develop into who people have encouraged me to become, paths they pushed me to take— to the point that I became confused by what was from me and what was from them.
Unfiltered & Unconcerned!
Children see the world around them in a perspective that’s often unfiltered and unconcerned with the opinions of others. Because of this, they have a more genuine approach to expressing themselves and don’t look for approval from others. Their heart and intentions are pure and they don’t have hidden agendas.
Children also rarely, if at all, focus on the way someone may view them and their differing opinions or viewpoints. I admire the confidence I see in each of my little lambs when they don’t budge and speak their minds! They aren’t phased one bit by what someone thinks or even knows is true.
They are a wonderful example of what it means to truly believe in yourself. My prayer is that this mindset will stick with each of them, and no matter what comes up, they’ll always be honest with themselves about what they want and need in their lives.
Authenticity & A Strong Heart
I encourage you all to pay attention to the light that your children shine. I’m grateful for the authenticity that shines through each of them. With all the experiences we face in life, learning to deal with them with authenticity and a strong heart is necessary to living a fulfilling life.
